February 2011
I'm nervous
I keep pestering my ma about making a doctor’s appointment for my physical so I can join the swim team. And till the tryouts start Ima train till my skin gets soggy and falls off my body. I really want this. To carry out the Chon swim team tradition, and I want to work for something! But I’m nervous, everyone keeps asking me if I’m joining varsity, but I keep telling them...
January 2011
So I was in art class being distracted by Hannah and chocolate when behold! My teacher’s cat jumps onto my chair and laid on me =) SO CUTE. But seriously, that is the cutest cat I’ve ever seen. It always rubs its head against me, he twitches when he gets scared, he lays on his back like a dog, and he lets me scratch his chin. Hehehehe, that cat made my day.
;____;
So Hannah and I watched Unborn and we kind of chickened out halfway through so we stopped. EHHH, first scary movie I was scared of continuing, in a while haah. SO FREAKKKY.
I learned something today,
My science teacher was talking to us about honor today. He spent a really loong time, but there was something he said at the end that really stuck out to me, and seemed to convict me a lot.
“We seem to care for the good of those we love more than our own good. But why can’t we love ourselves enough to want what’s good for us?”
Someone asked me the other day
And it really just made me pause and think.
“How’s you’re family doing? You guys doing okay?”
My answer was that, we were never okay. I’d like to see the day we’ll be okay. But till then, everything must be swept under that huge ol’ carpet we hide everything under.
Baduh duh dumm.
So I was in the car with Jessica domo and Hannah min when Jessica cut off some old man. He then honked 50 times and then drove next to us. Hannah said to not look, but I was hecka freaking out. I stared at him while he rolled down his window and yelled at us. My heart was hecka pumping, and I felt nervous. I looked into his car and saw two little girls sitting in the back scared. Even though he...
I take it back.
For a year I said I forgave my dad. I take it all back.
Ima get crackin with studying for finals.
Music on, and it’s slow and steady tonight. I should be okay with sex ed, science, and chinese. But idk bout english or math. Arrrgh. Time to turn this brain of mine onn.
It sucks to give someone your best when all you...
To try your hardest for someone so they can just look at you afterwards and say good job or I’m proud. After a while, it really screws with your mind. So stop trying to impress those people if they decide not to see how amazing and beautiful you truly are.
Faith
I can’t sleep if it’s quiet. My thoughts overtake me and questions fill up my mind. Moments, regrets, pasts, all start to play itself in my head.
I know I’m probably not the only one, but at night I can’t sleep if it’s silent. I start to think too much and my thoughts keep me awake. In order to sleep in peace, I need there to be sound; that’s why I feel so...
Forgiveness.
Now it’s pretty hard to make me mad, pretty damn hard. But if you do manage to anger me or bring up any negative emotion out of me, it’ll still be hard to make me hold that feeling. If someone does me wrong, if not all the time, most of the time I’ll just brush it off and move on. This is because I don’t like harboring negative emotions. There’s no need, life is...
Faith
I can’t sleep if it’s quiet. My thoughts overtake me and questions fill up my mind. Moments, regrets, pasts, all start to play itself in my head.
I know I’m probably not the only one, but at night I can’t sleep if it’s silent. I start to think too much and my thoughts keep me awake. In order to sleep in peace, I need there to be sound; that’s why I feel so...
“I’m not crazy, my reality is just different from others.”
I don't like it when someone looks me in the eyes...
“Stooop.”
I don't ask for much.
Especially when it comes to materialistic stuff, cause I was raised and taught that I am to either earn what I get or get it myself. But it’d be nice to get an Ipod this year. Cause I love music, and it’d be nice if I could listen to it whenever and where ever. I shall save up moolahs!
It's hard to let go.
You’ve been there for me so much over the past year. I can truly say last year was probably one of the craziest one I’ve ever had. While I felt lost, confused, hurt, alone, afraid, stressed, suffocated, you were there to help me breathe. You were there to open up the eyes I’ve forced shut to see that things will be okay again. You’ve calmed me down when my anxiety has just...
3D Street Artist Paintings by Edgar Muller
Jonathan Kim.
Jonathan Kim.
Jonathan Kim.
It's hard to let go.
You’ve been there for me so much over the past year. I can truly say last year was probably the craziest one I’ve had. While I felt lost, confused, hurt, alone, afraid, stressed, suffocated, you were there to help me breathe. You were there to open up the eyes I’ve forced shut to see that things will be okay again. You’ve calmed me down when my anxiety has just about...
One of the happiest memories I will ever have.
Falling asleep to my brother’s laughter while he watches the office.
Insecurity #1
One insecurity I have; is I doubt who I am. I’m hard on myself, I always tell myself I’m wrong, and I beat myself up over the smallest things. Everyone always seems to blame everything on me. And yknow what? I take that. I soak it all up like a sponge, cause when it comes to pain and hurt, it seems like I can live happily anyways…but I hate it when I’m misunderstood. Ever...
Insecurity #1
One insecurity I have; is I doubt who I am. I’m hard on myself, I always tell myself I’m wrong, and I beat myself up over the smallest things. Everyone always seems to blame everything on me. And yknow what? I take that. I soak it all up like a sponge, cause when it comes to pain and hurt, it seems like I can live happily anyways…but I hate it when I’m misunderstood. Ever...
Change project
MY BRAIN IS THROBBING.
